Lisa Laco is the popular radio host of CBC Radio's morning program, The Great Northwest. Her upbeat personality and energy add to the numerous interviews and commentaries she performs every morning. Lisa is also an active volunteer in the community of Thunder Bay. She is an outspoken advocate for children struggling with mental illnesses and is busy supporting an active family. Her zest for life seems at odds with her struggle with mental illness. Below is Lisa's firsthand account of how she's successfully managing her very full life.
I grew up in a household where my mom suffered from depression. I am the oldest of six children, and always felt in some way responsible for my mother's condition. It's only later in life that I realize that the overwhelming guilt I carried is part of my own struggle with depression.
I say that my mother "suffered" from depression because she truly did. She subjected herself to every treatment available at the time, including electro shock therapy. And it was horrible for her.
I remember being able to read her mental condition by simply looking at her eyes. If they were heavy... hooded... I knew she was having a tough time. She always talked about being "emotion-less" or incapable of feeling anything when her depression was at it's worst.
What's interesting, as well, is that of the six children, five of us have acknowledged our own depression and are receiving treatment. We joke that the one who is not, is simply in denial.
It's different for me. Now that I finally acknowledge that I have depression... I say I "live" with depression. Sometimes I suffer, sometimes I barely cope, and sometimes it's not a factor. But it's always there.
I struggle with depression. It's still difficult to acknowledge that I have a mental illness because that seems to carry a whole different stigma. But it's a stigma I'm determined should end.
I talk quite freely about having depression. I really don't care who knows. My family, my husband and two sons, know this about me. And I think it helps them to hear me talk about it. The more I talk, the more they realize that they are not the cause. They are not the problem. It's "my" illness. It's not their fault. That's my greatest concern. I don't want my children to experience what I did...spending years and years thinking it was all my fault.
I eventually inherited so much guilt that I blamed myself for anything that went wrong. If the sun didn't shine, somehow that was my fault. Now, with the help I've received, I'm feeling a lot better. I don't beat myself up as much. I like myself more. I accept that there will be "down times," but I know that they only last so long. They WILL end.
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